Archive for the ‘Punch’ Category

The Smurfs: Don’t even…

Sunday, August 21st, 2011

We can't.
We can’t.

AN OPEN LETTER

To The Producers of The Smurfs (we know who you are)

Fuck y’all, sirs!

First off, look at us. Look at our site. Look at how we spend our time. We are not picky. We’re total suckers for bad movies. Gluttons. Junkies. Alcoholics, but instead of alcohol it’s bad movies. And alcohol. Between us we probably spend $200 a month on movies and drinks to go with them. Generally, we’re pretty easygoing guys. (more…)

Green Lantern: Ryan Reynolds vs. A Cloud of Diarrhea in Space

Wednesday, June 29th, 2011

You be the judge.

You be the judge.

Real quick ‘cuz we based this one on a goof.

Every time your editors sat through a preview for Green Lantern, we’d nudge each other in the arm and say “that alien looks like Kelsey Grammer” when that purple alien shows up. Didn’t make us want to see the movie, but we got a kick out of that part. So we made a cocktail about it!

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Predators. It’s Good But Just One Thing Is Missing.

Saturday, July 31st, 2010

predators-movie-poster

Help me find your friends, please.

“Predators” is pretty awesome.  There are a lot of explosions, some aliens, a lot of guns, racial stereotypes, genre casting, rape jokes, and Lawrence Fishburne.  You can almost totally enjoy this movie.  Almost.

It’s clear that something’s been left out, and I’m not talking about Jesse “The Body” Ventura.  I’m talking about Arnold.  Arnold damn Schwarzenegger.  It’s really too bad that the director of this movie did not call the editors of DrankWithThat before making it.  Oh well, this guy’s mistake didn’t hold us back.  We brought what was missing in a cup.  Introducing the The Arnold Palmer Schwarzenjaeger.  Here’s how you make it:

  • On your way to the theater, stop off at a liquor store and pick up a bottle of Jaegermeister.  Jaegermeister is made out of deer blood and each bottle is carried in a hunter’s pouch before it’s sold.  It’s also from a German country.  You know this stuff is good.
  • Once you’re through the ticket tearer (it’s pretty easy with just one bottle of booze to stash), head to the concession stand and order a cup of lemonade and a cup of iced tea.  Sometimes these come in bottles, too.  If so, get a couple of cups.
  • When the lights go down, start blending your iced tea and lemonade 1 to 1, in typical Arnold Palmer fashion.  This can be accomplished in a number of ways but we suggest just pouring it into a third cup.
  • When the movie kicks off (and it kicks off pretty fast), pour a couple shots of Jaeger into your Arnold Palmer and “boom”, you’ve got yourself one tasty thematic drink.  The color goes dark, like man blood, which means you’re in business.

This drink is particularly good because it’s designed with some of the very concessions that theaters already provide to guests.  If they only knew that they were enabling you to enjoy this movie more to the max with their snack food options, don’t you think it would mean a lot to more to them?  Think about it!

Also, the editors should mention that “Predators” was reviewed during a double header with “Inception” so our favorable criticism might have something to do with our mind getting melted an hour before.

Read more about Predators on the popular movie site IMDB.

Read more about golf great Arnold Palmer on the popular Internet site Wikipedia.

Shutter Island: It’s surrounded by drink.

Wednesday, March 10th, 2010

shutter_island_ver2

Shutter Island is a movie directed by a famous filmmaker starring a very famous actor.  In the movie, people are crazy and people are going crazy.

Look above that guy’s match on the poster and you’ll see the phrase “Someone is Missing”.  Yeah, someone is missing.  He’s the guy that normally says fix the movie!  Unfortunately, the movie is not very good.  Fortunately, the name “Shutter Island” suggests a popular beverage of choice by your editors: Sutter Home.

What are you going to Drank With That?  We suggest the Sutter Island:

  • 2 parts Sutter Home White Zinfandel (preferably from a magnum bottle)
  • 1 part Hawaiian Punch (preferably from a can)
  • A splash of seltzer water or similarly bubbly beverage (to give it a little bit of crazy)
  • Mix in an unimposing bottle or pickle jar and put into a tote bag

The movie’s crappy but the beverage is delicious.  Watch out for stains, though.  Hawaiian Punch is a nightmare when it comes to laundry day.

Read about Shutter Island on the popular movie site IMDB.